2. don't skirt around the issue. just do his taxes. nothing says i'm into you like boosting him up into a new tax bracket ;^))
3. ruin every social tie he has, friend or otherwise. Then all his time will be free!!!
4. have a good, long, Skype call with his grandma. ask her for hot hot HOT sex tips. you know what they say, it gets better w/ age
5. Burn his belongings but in a fun way! fire is hot!!!
6. pull out all of his hair bit by bit every day in unnoticeable amounts. He'll get wet over this. give it to him as an anniversary gift.
7. tell him you're saving yourself for death. Demise makes the dick rise ;)
8. kill him. as the knife comes closer he'll realize who he's had a big crush on since middle …